Man, I'm so fucking tired of seeing people here and having to justify why I'm going to England. Is it really that upsetting that I'm not happy in my home country? And it isn't as if I haven't been moved away from home for the last two years either. It is virtually no different. No one went out of their way to visit me in Vancouver so that alleged "closeness" really doesn't matter. You don't go out of your way to see me because you enjoy my company. What ever happened to people's sense of adventure anyway? Remember when it was a cliche to go backpacking through Europe when you were 18 and graduated? When is someone considered "old enough" to move far away and take control of their life? I'm fucking 20 now. There are 20 year olds out there with careers.
My family (and I am speaking of non-parents family here) is the worst. I just sat through four hours of my aunt-through-marriage telling me I'm "too young" to be in love and move away (whilst saying she hopes I have a good time and all that "supportive" bullshit). I'm "too young" so I'm supposed to waste those years doing... what exactly? Enrolling in a four-year university course because we can afford it and it's expected of me, going for a degree that I'll probably never use? Working some chump job for two years like some of the grads I know? I took a one-year course for a reason. And sure, it's all well to say, you're 20, no one's really in love at 20, but I've never been so open or close or similar to anyone as I am with the Brit, so if that, the most real human connection I've had in my life, is not love, then what the fuck is love? Am I supposed to give up that one connection so I can go on and do what my family expects people of my age to do? Screw around with guys I can only mildly tolerate and waste money on classes just because I can? I've never been able to connect with my family. I thought it was an age thing. My older cousins could speak to everyone just fine. Then I got to be their age and my family still treated me like a child.
Naturally, I'll go off and focus on my photography and writing career, fail miserably, and probably end up back at university anyway, but until then, I can confidently say,
Listening to: -
Watching: 24 S2|Louis Theroux
Playing: PKMNz: Emerald